In a previous article we talked about why the underestimated and frequently rescheduled one-to-one meeting really matters. One of the main reasons is the direct link they have to whether or not an employee feels engaged at work. Figures such as these below can’t be ignored!
- Employees whose managers hold regular one-on-one meetings are almost three times more likely to be engaged at work compared to those who don’t have regular check-ins.1
- Companies with highly engaged employees, who often benefit from regular one-to-ones, experience a 21% increase in productivity.2
- Engaged employees, who typically have regular one-to-ones, are 87% less likely to leave their organisation.2
- Regular one-to-ones contribute to a 15% increase in employee performance.2
We now know why they matter, so in this article we’ll provide practical tips to help you feel more confident in conducting them!
But before we dive into that, let’s explore some of the main reasons why, in our experience, one-to-ones don’t happen or aren’t prioritised…
Not enough time: Everyone’s busy and finding time for one-to-ones can be tough, or they are often the first thing to be sacrificed if time is needed elsewhere.
Lack of perceived value: The value and impact of one-to-ones are often not appreciated. They are seen as a “nice to have” rather than an essential part of team management.
Fear of conflict: Both managers and team members might avoid one-to-ones because of the potential for uncomfortable discussions. Whether it’s giving or receiving feedback, addressing challenges, or talking about personal development, the fear of confrontation can be a significant barrier.
Inconsistent follow-up: When actions and commitments from one-to-ones aren’t followed up on, the meetings can feel pointless. Both parties might think the meetings aren’t leading to real outcomes, reducing their motivation to continue.
Conflicting roles: Balancing time between various responsibilities can be tricky. Managers often juggle multiple roles and are targeted on results. Justifying the time for one-to-ones to themselves or others can be difficult.
Lack of training / confidence: Many managers and team members haven’t received proper training on how to conduct effective one-to-ones. Without guidance, they might feel unsure about the process and its benefits. It is therefore easier to avoid them than risk looking unprepared.
Cultural barriers: In some organisational cultures, one-to-ones might not be a common practice. If the culture doesn’t support or promote regular check-ins, it can be challenging to implement them.
Remote work challenges: When teams work remotely, scheduling and conducting one-to-ones can be more difficult. Technical issues, time zone differences, and lack of face-to-face interaction can all contribute to this challenge.
Over-reliance on group meetings: Some managers might rely too heavily on group meetings to communicate with their team, thinking that one-to-ones are redundant. However, group meetings can’t replace the personalised attention and support that one-to-ones provide.
Personal discomfort: Some managers and team members might feel uncomfortable with the intimacy of one-to-ones. They might prefer to keep interactions more formal and less personal.
Lack of clear objectives: Without clear objectives for one-to-ones, they can feel aimless and unproductive. Both parties need to understand the purpose and goals of these meetings to make them effective.
Previous experiences: Negative past experiences with one-to-ones can shape an individual’s view of these meetings. If someone has had unproductive or uncomfortable one-to-ones with previous managers, they might be reluctant to engage in them again.
Top tips:
Understanding why one-to-ones often get overlooked is the first step in making them a regular and valuable part of your routine. Now that we’ve identified some common barriers, let’s dive into some practical tips to ensure your one-to-ones are effective, engaging, and beneficial for both you and your team.
1. Prepare
Going into a one-to-one having taken the time to think about what you want to talk about can make sure that the conversation is useful and productive. Both individuals should come prepared with topics to discuss, ensuring the meeting is focused and valuable. This doesn’t have to be overly onerous. It often helps to have a set agenda so that you know what you will be discussing, for example:
- Check in / wellbeing discussion
- Feedback (positive and improvement-focused)
- Progress
- Successes
- Challenges
- Personal development
2. Commit and prioritise
Prioritising one-to-ones above all else demonstrates their importance and your commitment to your team member. You wouldn’t cancel a client meeting so why would you cancel a colleague’s one-to-one?
3. Create a safe space
The most common question we get asked is how do you deal with a team member who doesn’t open up / bring anything to discuss or responds to questions with ‘everything is fine’?
Our top tip is to co-create a space that works for you both so that they know what to expect. This will involve you sharing what you need from one-to-ones and asking them what they would find useful. If it is a new or junior colleague, it might be the first time they have had a one-to-one but so you could try questions like:
- How do you prefer to work?
- What do you respond well to / not well to?
And allow time for just a general catch up on how they are too, a big part of one-to-ones is building and strengthening your relationship. This means getting to know more about your colleague than just their to do list, take a genuine interest in who they are and what they care about.
4. Let them do the talking
Also linked to number 3, the risk with quieter team members is you fill the space and do most of the talking. Try questions such as:
- What are you most proud of over the last week / month?
- What has frustrated you the most?
- What could I do more / less of to support you better?
Active listening is key here and avoiding jumping in to fill the space. We know that for some people this is the trickiest part!
5. Don’t only focus on problems
While addressing issues is important, one-to-ones should also highlight successes and positive feedback. Considering both helps to demonstrate you take a balanced approach which enables improvement-focused feedback to land better and increases motivation and engagement. Make sure feedback is two-way, one-to-ones provide a great opportunity to increase awareness of your leadership approach too.
6. Be clear on actions and follow up
Another common question we get asked is how to track actions and who should follow up? Our response is always, who has responsibility for the action? If it is the individual, if you follow up with actions it only muddies the water. Ask them to take notes and to share them after the one-to-one or spend 5 minutes at the end capturing them together as part of the discussion.
7. Don’t neglect wellbeing
Ignoring the employee’s wellbeing can lead to burnout and disengagement. Regularly check in on how they are feeling and offer support where needed.
Conclusion
Understanding the importance of one-to-ones and the common barriers to conducting them is the first step towards making these meetings a regular and valuable part of your routine. By addressing challenges such as time constraints, lack of perceived value, fear of conflict, and previous negative experiences, you can create a more supportive and productive environment for your team.
Implementing practical tips like preparing in advance, committing to the meetings, creating a safe space, encouraging open communication, balancing feedback, and following up on actions can transform your one-to-ones into powerful tools for engagement and development. Remember, regular check-ins not only boost employee engagement and productivity but also contribute to higher retention and overall performance.
By prioritising and improving your one-to-ones, you demonstrate your commitment to your team’s growth and wellbeing, ultimately fostering a more motivated and successful organisation.
CAPE are the people experts for founder and owner led organisations. Visit our website to learn more.
References:
1 Gallup, 2015. State of the American Manager: Analytics and Advice for Leaders. Available at: https://d46w5x9vt7qfg.cloudfront.net/businessreport/2015/04/StateOfAmericanManager_032715_mhLowRes.pdf
2Vantage Circle, 2025. 10 Must-Know Employee Engagement Statistics For 2025. Available at: https://www.vantagecircle.com/en/blog/employee-engagement-statistics/
